“Personality begins where comparison leaves off. Be unique. Be memorable. Be confident. Be proud.”
“Comparison is the death of joy.” ― Mark Twain
I found these two quotes and thought they were pretty accurate! I spend a lot of my time comparing myself to other people. Deciding they are better than me, prettier than me, skinnier than me (this appears to be a daily one!). It gets quite annoying after a while, constantly comparing myself to others and making myself feel bad and lacking in confidence.
Lack of confidence has been a theme in my life and has held me back from all sorts of things. I decide that people don’t want me there, I’m intruding or that I would be annoying. I don’t trust that they aren’t going to talk about me behind my back and I get paranoid. I have some lovely friends and family and I know this isn’t the case but it’s another example of where I have to click my logic brain in and stop being silly.
Be confident. Be proud.
These are two things that I find really hard but when I am it feels so much better. When I have achieved something and allow myself to be proud of it, there is no better feeling and this translates to confidence. A friend of mine will often tell me to “Be the crown” remember this! It’s a great life mantra!!
When people first meet me they would be surprised if I told them that I had no confidence. I think this is because I am quite a vocal and outgoing person. It’s self-confidence that I lack and this is what triggers the comparisons, it’s such a hard thing to get out of. Sort of like a habit, sometimes I will see a person and think “wow, they look great – look at me I look hideous” and this will spiral into not liking myself and feeling horrible. Not a good place to be. It becomes quite a dark place and I start to go back into my head and remove myself from the situation. The blinkers are back on and the darkness decends. Cue logic brain – telling myself not to be silly and trying to pull myself out of it. It’s strange how much of an affect other people can have on you. Most of the time they don’t even realise it, again I think if they did they would try and help and reassure you.
I’m trying to push myself past these things at the moment, attend events and social gatherings to encourage my logic to kick in and try and prove to myself that everyone is the same and no one person is better than another. No one person should make you feel bad and put you into a sad place. If they do then it’s on them and it shouldn’t be on you.
Another scenario where logic brain needs to have a stern word with the totes emosh brain! These two spend a lot of time arguing in my life. I’m just starting to side with logic more of the time nowadays!