How often are you in a scenario where you decide what another person is thinking and let that consume you? Guess what…we have no idea what other people are thinking and the process of mind reading is just our cheeky little brains deciding for us what other people think. The brain is mean and we need to ignore it!
I spend a lot of my time guessing what people are thinking. Deciding for myself that they are talking about me or upset with me. I have spent hours feeling sad and anxious about the way someone has replied to me in a message or that saying “no” has upset them so they aren’t speaking to me anymore. Not the case I realised hours later!
What I have noticed is that people often don’t realise that small responses or snap answers can cause these kind of reactions. Anyone that suffers with a lack of confidence will often project or mind read, decide that when someone looks at them in a certain way they are judging. This causes them to worry and feel sad.
This happens to me a lot, I have had to learn that this isn’t the case at all and in some case people are just busy, or in the middle of something. It’s really easy to think negatively about yourself and assume that a “Yep” or a “sure” mean that people don’t want to talk to you or that they are fobbing you off. Don’t take this kind of response personally and if you are getting this from someone close to you tell them that this way of communication upsets you. They will be quick to tell you otherwise and clear up any misunderstanding I’m sure. I know that I am also guilty of a snap response when I am busy!!
Mind reading can be a really dangerous thing to do and it is a difficult habit to break. Assuming people are thinking the worst of you and talking about you behind your back is really hard to deal with. It leads to feeling paranoid and makes it hard to trust people. Over time I have managed to suppress the mind reading and just accept what people say as the truth. This doesn’t stop me worrying and assuming that people are being mean about me but I know this is silly and I should try and forget about it.
To try and do this I focus my attention on something else, something that consumes my mind for a period of time. This stops the thoughts and helps me to calm down and ignore my little brain when it’s trying to churn up trouble!!