Sitting on the edge of life, watching the merry go round!

Have you ever sat at the side of your life, watching everyone and everything carry on but you cant seem to jump back in? This is how I felt when I was at my worst. I felt like I was limbo not being able to move forward and never breaking the cycle. I could see…

Getting away from it all

This week I am away on holiday – taking some time out to recharge and get away from it all. It feels like it has been a long time coming. We have been away for 2 days so far and as predicted day 1 was still full of worry and anxiety. However, today we have…

Worry worry go away…dont come again another day!

I’m going on holiday tomorrow! Time to chill out, recoup and have some time to relax. However, think someone forgot to tell my anxiety…I still have the Sunday night worry and I am overly concerned about how things will go at work whilst I am away. I cant control anything that happens when I’m not…

When a weekend isn’t long enough…

Tougher times have been around lately. I have been having a hard time getting through each day without the actual feeling of pressure on my chest. For years I would refer to being under pressure but not actually physically feeling that pressure. The easier days are getting few and far between at the moment and…

Pre-weekend planning

Over the last few weeks I have been taking the time to work from home on a Friday and this has been the BEST decision. It is a timeout from the office but it is also an opportunity for me to complete the week. Read through all of my emails, finalise any admin tasks and…

Dysmorphic madness

One of the things I suffer with is body dysmorphia. This is something that comes and goes but has popped its head up with vengeance recently. To the point that I cant even bear myself in the clothes I am wearing. This is somewhat inconvenient when this happens on a train at 7.30 on a…

Everyone is a little bit the same..

Living with depression and anxiety is a rollercoaster. Some days you are up and everything is fine and other days are a real grind. Throughout this blog I have tried to explain how my illness makes me feel and how I cope with it. I do a lot of research myself and follow a lot…

Balancing act

I have been trying to work out how to manage my stress and keep myself acting normally at the same time. In my work I seem to end the week feeling really stressed and overwhelmed, one small thing can push me over the edge. I take on too much and end up letting things consume…

The checklist

I spend a lot of my time making lists in my head to help me to cope with my anxiety. These lists usually go round the houses with things being added and removed within seconds of each other! The main things I have on every list are: – How do I get there? – How…

The grip of the week ahead

How do people deal with the grip of anxiety that appears ahead of the week? It always claws up at the end of the weekend or a holiday and takes hold in my chest. It’s a wave of panic that doesn’t seem to go away. It will subside for a while when I’m distracted but…

Anxiety and its claws

Anxiety is not a friendly beast, when it gets its claws into you it is very hard to break free. This happens to me at the strangest times, frequently when I am in Sainsbury’s! Not the most scary of places but such is the beast… When it does raise its head it is hard to…

Sometimes a reminder is all you need

This week has definitely had its ups and downs. It’s not been the best start to the year and a combination of factors made for a sleepless few nights and a very sad and anxious start to the weekend. Lack of sleep is the worst thing for me, I cannot function unless I have rested…